College has officially started this week. So I am trying to blog and do homework at the same time. Honestly, my shirt/jacket-thingy I got from the Economy Shop. The Economy Shop is only the best thrift store on the West Side of Chicago located in Oak Park. I had been waiting until my first real day of painting to actually "mess it up" with my stylish oil paint brushstrokes. A lot of times I feel a little self conscious especially about how loud my style is on campus, and maybe a few of my readers feel that way as well. Still, know that no matter what it is always good to be different and besides in my opinion you are never too overdressed. I felt the need to be creative today. I know that this outfit did not come from a big store or online store, but for once I want to focus on being and doing me. Right now, it doesn't matter if I get sponsors or not. Right now, what matters is that I had the confidence to be me no matter what. I never really told anyone how I felt about fashion blogging at first, but I think now is the right time to tell that story.
I always dreamed of blogging, but I was not exactly the most confident person in the world. I was dealing with some body image issues since I was like 13 until 19, for six years, which was recently this year. It was not easy turning off that negative voice in my head or not comparing myself to other girls. I thought I had it all under control until last year I finally gave in and prayed to God for real. Often times, I feel like as Christians we are so caught up praying about the world, our families, praying for discerning spirits, that we forget to talk to God about what is really going on with us. My first year of college really opened my eyes about how I wanted to see myself in the future. I asked myself did I really want to live the rest of my life upset about how God chose to make me or did I want to be thankful and accept myself. I got some extra help through counseling, prayed, read a few books, and I really pulled myself together. To a lot of people that might seem fast but six years was such a long time to struggle with how I saw myself. Having negative self body image issues not only affected me internally, but it affected me in relationship choices, and in my dream of blogging. I noticed that when it came to dating or not really dating, but seeking people it was always because I wanted someone to make me feel better about myself. When they told me something bad about myself I would try to change myself, and this went on for a while. Until I figured out that I deserve the best and reading Lisa Bevere's book, "Kissed The Girls and Made Them Cry" helped me as well. Knowing that I am a daughter from a king helped me realize that I should not have to change for me, and I should not make anyone change for me. Once I did this I stopped searching for love because I knew that no matter what I am loved by my Heavenly Father. Whether a guy likes me or not I cannot change for anyone I can only be the only Makayla I can be. I see a difference in myself. Like, there is a new confidence in me and it's not because I know that I am just all that and I have my life put together because I don't it's because I really truly did find the greatest love of all. I found love through God and the love inside of me. I used to hinder my fashion blog because I was afraid I would look fat, and no one would like or follow my blog. I was wrong because I believe I look great, and people have started liking my blog. I personally feel a little sad that some people have not read my blog or gave it a chance, because I talk about some great stuff on here.
So why am I talking about the issue I had and overcame? Because my FancyMouse darlings, I want each and every one of you to feel confident and beautiful in your own skin! No matter if that means praying, or going through counseling, or reading self-help books. It doesn't matter if it takes you awhile to get through this just know that you are not alone. I wrote this piece for the people who wonder what is this blog about? This blog is about fashion, but it also focuses on women's' empowerment through God. Whether that means a piece on modesty, purity, or encouragement. I want every young woman reading this to feel as great about themselves as I do. This is why at the end of every blog post I put PSALMS 139:13-15, because I want every girl and woman, no matter what shape or size that they are God's wonderful Masterpiece. It is so beautiful to me to know that God knitted me together in my mother's womb. It lets me know how great of an artist He is and how much He loves me and you because He could have just thrown us together but He did not. I am a fan of God's work and you should be too.
PSALMS 139:13-15